Guest 693- Registered: 12 Nov 2009
- Posts: 1,266
So very sorry to hear this sad, sad news. Deepest condolences, Rog - hope to see you very soon.
True friends stab you in the front.
Guest 653- Registered: 13 Mar 2008
- Posts: 10,540
Sorry I've not been able to give any update on Jean's funeral, but it seems that it could be turning into a soap-opera and this, I am finding, is very stressful.
I don't want to go into all the ins and outs, but Jean died 10 days after her operation for sclerosing of the peritoneum. The surgeons and ICU team completed a report and sent it to the Coroner, but he wasn't satisfied with that, so ordered a Post-Mortem, he has had that report and is still not satisfied so has now ordered an inquest, which will mean that I need to make another trip to Manchester to formally indentify Jean to open the Inquest.
We had provisionally booked the Funeral Directors, the Minister and the RCPYC for next Friday, the 31st. of May and was hoping I could advise you all of this.
I was hoping the Manchester Coroner's office would have advised me on Thursday about the Inquest as they had the report from the Pathologist that day, but I heard nothing and the first time I knew there may be an inquest was at 16.05 Friday afternoon and they close at 16.00, so I won't know anything further until 09.00 Tuesday morning - it's Bank Holiday week-end so Monday they'll be closed.
I'm sorry; I'm sorry this is all going on, I'm sorry I can't tell everyone when Jean's funeral is actually going to take place. As you can see it's 03.50 (I was up at 02.30) and I can't sleep.
Hopefully, I'll know more Tuesday morning.
A big thank you to everyone who has sent me Sympathy cards, they've made me cry of course (yesterday was a bad day for me, but I'm told it's good to cry) and thanks to all you members for your very supportive postings, they've helped a lot too.
Roger
Brian Dixon
- Location: Dover
- Registered: 23 Sep 2008
- Posts: 23,940
so sorry to hear that roger.i hope it all go's well in the end.keep your chin up and be positive.
Terry Nunn
- Location: London Road, Dover
- Registered: 12 Mar 2008
- Posts: 4,316
We all understand Roger, this is the last thing you need at this time. As Brian says, keep your chin up, we are all with you in spirit.
Terry
Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?
Guest 655- Registered: 13 Mar 2008
- Posts: 10,247
yes, keep your chin up Roger.
Jan Higgins
- Location: Dover
- Registered: 5 Jul 2010
- Posts: 13,895
Yes it is good to cry it helps to relieve the stress, I am so sorry you are having so many additional problems because of the Coroner.
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I try to be neutral and polite but it is hard and getting even more difficult at times.
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Guest 657- Registered: 13 Mar 2008
- Posts: 3,037
I am so sorry to hear that you are having to deal with all this on top of everything else Roger.
Yes it is good to cry, let it out. Some days are always better than others and as I am sure others will vouch for the fact that in time although it still hurts, we look at things a little differently and cope with it a little better.
I do hope everything is sorted out quickly. Take care xx
Guest 715- Registered: 9 Jun 2011
- Posts: 2,438
Terrible time for you Roger, I can only imagine how you must be feeling. Hopefully the Coroner has your interest at heart and is going the extra mile to see that all the circumstances surrounding the death are properly investigated. I do not know you personally but your love for Jean shone through on your postings on here, be strong.
Audere est facere.
Guest 698- Registered: 28 May 2010
- Posts: 8,664
You know you have our support too, Roger. Anything we can do to help, just ask.
I'm an optimist. But I'm an optimist who takes my raincoat - Harold Wilson
howard mcsweeney1- Location: Dover
- Registered: 12 Mar 2008
- Posts: 62,352
i can only echo the above - the delay must be intolerable.
Guest 710- Registered: 28 Feb 2011
- Posts: 6,950
Deary me, Rodger. This is a bother, and no mistake.
I'm sure that you are in your own personal Hell, but I doubt whether this delay can possibly make the agony more keen.
You yet have the temporary release from anguish to come, as you will have the opportunity to perform the one final service for your beloved Jean, the funeral itself.
There is always much to be done that is painfully tedious, and I hope that you can fill part of the enforced waiting time employed doing that which must be done.
Above all of this is surely the knowledge that the tremendous sense of loss you feel is in proportion to that which you once had and enjoyed; the time, the life and the love you shared with Jean. That it was ever so, is a cause for continual jubilation.
I wish you all the very best.
Ignorance is bliss, bliss is happiness, I am happy...to draw your attention to the possible connectivity in the foregoing.
Guest 650- Registered: 12 Mar 2008
- Posts: 542
Oh Roger, what a wearisome irksome process for you, and it is one of those laws that whenever one is needing answers it's impossible to get them owing to its being a weekend or that the only person who knows is on the other line, or out of the office, and so it goes on and on.
With all you have to think about and with all you are feeling, you are grand to be posting here. There is absolutely no need to apologise for anything, and we're just dreadfully sorry that it's being prolonged like this and you can't get things arranged. Everyone is behind you and understands - and you have every licence in the world to feel however you do feel right now. Crying is good, anger is good, smiling, as you will do, is good, numbness too. It's all part of caring for yourself and continuing your care and love for Jean - because that is what you are expressing.
All your friends are here for you and thinking of you constantly.
Guest 656- Registered: 13 Mar 2008
- Posts: 2,262
So sorry Roger to hear about all this additional stress you are under right now, hopefully on Tuesday you will have some news which enables you to move forward. Our thoughts & prayers are with you always during this very sad time. I'm sure Jean is looking out for you & she will give you the strength & courage to cope with everything over the coming weeks.
Guest 756- Registered: 6 Jun 2012
- Posts: 727
Try and rest Roger, remember the best of times you shared with Jean and Heather, laugh, cry get angry, all normal responses, those that care for you understand your pain and will always be there when you need them.
Guest 653- Registered: 13 Mar 2008
- Posts: 10,540
Thank You Tom, it is indeed the knowledge that the tremendous sense of loss I feel, is in proportion to that which I once had and enjoyed; the time, the life and the love I shared with Jean.
Thank You also Maggie, some things are indeed "irksome". I have found that it helps to make postings on here, not sure why, but it does.
Thank you too Collette, I certainly hope that Tuesday brings good news. I have a beautiful photo sent to me a couple of months ago, that was taken on my 40th. Birthday (yes I know a long, long time ago now), but I have enlarged it and printed it off on proper photo paper and it is so lovely, looking at that photo every day, keeps me O.K.
I'll have to work out how to load photos on here.
I sincerely do thank each and everyone one of you for your warming postings, they are all appreciated.
Roger
Guest 653- Registered: 13 Mar 2008
- Posts: 10,540
I had to come up to Manchester early this morning to formally identify Jean, then spend a couple of hours with the Police, then get a bus into the City Centre and look for the Coroner's office.
I am relieved now to say that Jean's funeral can now go ahead this coming Friday at 2.40 pm at .Barham Crem.
The hearse will be leaving our house at 2pm-ish.
If people who would like allift, I'm sure there'll be a seat.
I thought I'd never get there.
Thank you for your patience and see you Friday afternoon.
Roger
Keith Sansum1
- Location: london
- Registered: 25 Aug 2010
- Posts: 23,942
roger
i will do all i can to be there
ALL POSTS ARE MY OWN PERSONAL VIEWS
howard mcsweeney1- Location: Dover
- Registered: 12 Mar 2008
- Posts: 62,352
relieved to hear it is sorted at last.
Keith Sansum1- Location: london
- Registered: 25 Aug 2010
- Posts: 23,942
and nice to see you recently roger
ALL POSTS ARE MY OWN PERSONAL VIEWS
Terry Nunn- Location: London Road, Dover
- Registered: 12 Mar 2008
- Posts: 4,316
Glad that it's all sorted now Roger. We'll have two seats going spare if someone wants a lift. My email address is in my profile.
Terry
Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?