31 December 2010
19:4587062#1
Hi Guys - Day Two of my blog is now up and running, and is underneath the Day One if you scroll down! I would value your thoughts, and thank you to those who have already responded - it is genuinely appreciated.
Thank you Guys.
Ross Miller
- Location: London Road, Dover
- Registered: 17 Sep 2008
- Posts: 3,709
31 December 2010
20:3287072#2
Thanks Bern - sorry left a really long comment lol
"Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today." - James Dean
"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength,
While loving someone deeply gives you courage" - Laozi
Guest 657- Registered: 13 Mar 2008
- Posts: 3,037
31 December 2010
21:5187089#3
Thanks Bern, I missed this yesterday. I have left a comment.
Jan Higgins
- Location: Dover
- Registered: 5 Jul 2010
- Posts: 13,931
31 December 2010
23:2187098#4
I am glad you flagged this up Bern I would have missed it otherwise.
What on earth is going on in the medical world have they lost the word 'caring' from the supposed caring profession.
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I try to be neutral and polite but it is hard and getting even more difficult at times.
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1 January 2011
17:1587149#5
Thank you for your reply Jan. This is the endgame of a horrible process of de-humanisation in the health services. I have been around a long time and have seen nursing deteriorate - for whatever reasons, and I refuse, at the moment, to dabble in a political argument about it. The fact is, nursing used to be a noble and caring calling. Now any old eejit can do it with painted fingernails, no heart, and a head full of fluff. The great nurses - and there are some truly great nurses some of whom I have met even in this hellish hospital - become disheartened and leave. Guess who that leaves behind?
1 January 2011
21:3087198#6
Hi Guys - Day Three is now up on the blog. My Mother is at least not deteriorating, and I will continue to blog about the experiences of the customers of the NHS as well as the experiences of people with strokes and their circles of support. Thank you to everyone who has contacted me with their good wishes and also to share with me their own stories of enduring neglect and worse with the NHS. I am so sorry you have suffered, and I am very grateful that you have taken the trouble to share.
Thank You.
1 January 2011
21:3087199#7
Hi Guys - Day Three is now up on the blog. My Mother is at least not deteriorating, and I will continue to blog about the experiences of the customers of the NHS as well as the experiences of people with strokes and their circles of support. Thank you to everyone who has contacted me with their good wishes and also to share with me their own stories of enduring neglect and worse with the NHS. I am so sorry you have suffered, and I am very grateful that you have taken the trouble to share.
Thank You.
Guest 690- Registered: 10 Oct 2009
- Posts: 4,150
1 January 2011
22:5387215#8
Compulsive reading Bern and as I said to you, it could effect one or two on here at anytime, you have to experience it to believe it. I just wish to say here that the staff were pleasant when I was taken in a short while ago and I remembered a few from recent years. One or two though were completely out of place for a stroke ward or an emergency ward. It was by the way the stroke unit which I was taken to first as an emergency case, mentioned in Bern`s blog. I suggest everyone reads Bern`s blog and at least confirm they`ve read it even without making comment. It could easy be you or your loved one`s next time rather than Bern`s mother. The NHS is very understaffed, and lacking the right people to do the job.
Tell them that I came, and no one answered.
howard mcsweeney1- Location: Dover
- Registered: 12 Mar 2008
- Posts: 62,352
1 January 2011
23:0087217#9
you are so right about the staff colin, i disagree about understaffing though.
as i see it they have the numbers right, but the high quality ones are dragged down by the time servers.
a report was issued today about maternity services that made clear that expectant mums should go into labour during the day and not rely on the night dregs to deliver.
Guest 690- Registered: 10 Oct 2009
- Posts: 4,150
1 January 2011
23:0487219#10
Actually Howard it`s just Canterbury where I found the understaffing, and staff did mention it, whereas up at Kings College, (alot busier anyway), they do have a full compliment I believe, but Canterbury were short of staff during my visit.
Tell them that I came, and no one answered.
1 January 2011
23:1587220#11
Unbelievable.. or is it, guess we all know some good and bad stories regarding care of patients in hospital. Seems to be care is becoming more like a throw of the dice.
Haven't met you Bern but hope things are getting better.
Jan Higgins- Location: Dover
- Registered: 5 Jul 2010
- Posts: 13,931
1 January 2011
23:2187222#12
I really hate to say this Bern and I might not have chosen the most tactful way of saying it and for that I am very sorry, do you think they have written your mother off because of her age. Apologies again
.
I notice one of our vociferous forum members has been unusually quiet on this subject, he normally has a firm opinion about everything to do with our local hospital.
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I try to be neutral and polite but it is hard and getting even more difficult at times.
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Guest 653- Registered: 13 Mar 2008
- Posts: 10,540
2 January 2011
08:4387227#13
Jean had two strokes when she was in her late thirties and the hospital (not sure if it was Kings or the Royal Free) told her then that had she been 70 they wouldn't have bothered.
That was some time ago of course and I hope that the ageism attitude has now changed, but it is the lack of care that is perhaps the most shocking in Bern's Mum's case.
I'll now read the 3rd instalment.
Roger
Guest 700- Registered: 11 Jun 2010
- Posts: 2,868
2 January 2011
12:3387239#14
In addition to seeing a loved one very ill, to have to make continual complaints about their care must be very exhausting, but it obviously can have some success after persistence - well done Bern, our sympathies are with you.
When something is wrong, it can take a lot of effort (and distress) to get it put right but we should all take heart and persist where at all possible until things are improved. And they often can be!
Over thirty years ago I had the most appalling treatment in hospital when our son was born and conditions were dreadful, no spare bed, shortage of nurses (Bank Holiday), glass jar I was given for a sample had a big chunk of glass out of it, and I have never seen such filthy toilets anywhere... the drip I was put on to be induced did not work and husband 'fiddled' with it all night.
In the morning the consultant was extremely angry and asked who had prepared me for the birth. After the op I was very ill and asked a nurse if I was going to die... I was told "I don't know" very forcibly !!! There was no reassurance or comfort.
Noticing (every morning) cockroaches on the floor if I mentioned to the nurse she always said "So what??"
I was not washed for over a week (and it was very hot weather) ...
When I got home (had a kidney infection for 6 weeks afterwards and a lot of pain), I wrote a complaint to the hospital.
A friend who knew the person dealing with the letter at the hospital came up to see me and gave me a lecture on "You have no right to complain".
It was very distressing at the time and I felt I was the one at fault .... I felt too ill and weak at the time to object.
Thank goodness making a complaint is much easier now.
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Lincolnshire Born and Bred
2 January 2011
13:3687255#15
Thank you to all of you - you can't know how much your support is meaning to me. So very many people have shared their horrific stories now, it has become clear that this appalling service cannot go unchallenged. I think the comments about age are accurate, although some have told me about other wholly unacceptable and dangerous practices involving younger people and children - I don't think it is as much about age as about simple lack of care and respect and an "organisation" that does not have any control over itself or the people working in it. It isn't all about money, it is about the right people being led by the right leaders doing the right things - and that does not rely just on money.
There have been some positive things as well, and I will continue to blog and tell you about those as well: yesterday an absolutely lovely nurse called Tom (he has morphed into Kind Nurse#2!) spontaneously introduced himself to me, smiled, and asked how I was (blimey) and even though he was not "working at this end" he went and found someone who was. I was almost speechless with gratitude. And two fabulous tiny Filipina nurses made my Mother as comfortable as they could, and I could hear them talking to her behind the curtains even though she is still unresponsive. Just as it should be done - I can't tell you what that felt like.
It does not, however, blind me to the fact that I still do not trust them and I think they are the exception. Those first 3 days were Hell, and I have absolutely no confidence that they are not repeated overnight or when I am not there. The charts were still incorrectly competed and shabby, signatures were not being applied as I had asked (and incidentally as they should be) so there was still little accountability, some of the nurses were clearly not up to it. BUT I will continue to blog, and will continue to pressure, and will let you all know how things are. The most important thing immediately is for my Mother to have all the nursing care she needs. The next biggie is to have a conversation with someone at the PCT about this sorry experience. Watch this space. Days 4&5 are in draft and soon to be published.
And thank you with all my heart.
2 January 2011
20:5087371#16
Hi Guys - Days Four Five and Six are now on the blog. You have been terrific, and in your name as well as my Mothers I will continue with this. Please don't get bored with it - it matters and it could be you or someone you love enduring this horror.
Thank you Chaps
howard mcsweeney1- Location: Dover
- Registered: 12 Mar 2008
- Posts: 62,352
2 January 2011
20:5987375#17
it is time for me to stop reading the blog, i am finding it too distressing and frustrating to read about a senior lady being treated or not treated this way.
the post from kath on this thread made my blood boil, as has been said the word "care" is sometimes used in a cavalier fashion.
i am now of the opinion that if the patient is in control of their faculties all the stops will be pulled out, otherwise forget it.
2 January 2011
21:1387380#18
Please don't stop reading Howard. It would be easier for me to stop writing it and just roll over, but that way lies madness. Kaths experience, and all the others that people have been kind enough to share with me after reading the blog - which is also on National sites - makes me all the more determined to keep it up. If people like you stop reading it - and more importantly stop feeling angry - there is no point. You have made a difference to this forumite with your words - don't lets stop now.
Guest 698- Registered: 28 May 2010
- Posts: 8,664
2 January 2011
21:3087381#19
Bern, even those of us who do not post prolifically are following your horror story (for that is what it is) with fascination and vicarious anger. Keep it up, your mother needs you, in fact all our mothers need someone like you who is sufficiently knowledgeable, articulate and feisty to stand up to the medical establishment. We are proud of our battleaxe.
I'm an optimist. But I'm an optimist who takes my raincoat - Harold Wilson
2 January 2011
21:4987384#20
Try and stop me at your peril!!
And Thank You, very very much indeed.