Guest 716- Registered: 9 Jun 2011
- Posts: 4,010
#1
On the surface they look as though they are united and enjoying themselves.........do you believe it it`s the old Tory propaganda again.....dream on right winger............
Conservative MP to a Conservative MP friend...........
Dear Colin,
Can it really be a year since we got rat-arsed at that awful tapas bar? It doesn't seem possible, does it?
Yet here I am again, unpacking my Y-fronts and policy papers in a mid-range hotel room so dull and oppressive I'm almost GLAD when one of Stewart's teenage wonks drops by with another "hot button briefing". Actually, the last speccy twerp was quite useful, managed to get the telly working. (Did you know that brush-faced buffoon Noel Edmonds is back? Wearing fancy dress, opening boxes. Had no idea. And people blame US for the state this country's in.)
Have switched off the telly now, left the room and moved to something called a Residents' Lounge. It's one of those hotels des nouveaux, you know the sort. Ghastly "buffet breakfast room" filled with shark-eyed reps and provincial wedding guests, bloody awful pop music hanging in the air like a bad smell. Christ, these places always make me feel like Philip Larkin.
Conference is definitely the worst thing about being In Government. Oh, standing on a stage talking b*****ks through a shit-eating grin to rows of back-stabbing bastards is grim enough whichever political tribe you belong to. But there's something exquisitely horrible about being the last lot on. You can see how badly it's gone for the other parties. Hostile delegates. Bloody media hanging round the fringe like sarcastic zombies. It's like being in a queue at the abattoir. Ha ha, oh look there are my opponents up ahead, shuffling towards Kirsty Wark and her bolt gun. Oh wait, I'm next...
Did you catch the other conferences? I mean the main two, obviously. I'm assuming that neither of us gives a toss about the early ones: the thin vegetarian cyclists from Brighton, the fat Battle of Britain fetishists from Hove etc. Opposition had the usual car crash, didn't they? We all slowed down to gawp at the damage but to be honest, I couldn't even recognise most of the casualties. No, what really boiled my p**s was the shameless performance of a certain Fergus Williams at the Inbetweeners' conference. Did you see him? Oily little shit.
When he stands there exuding that fake bonhomie, that counterfeit confidence, he reminds me of every estate agent I've ever met. More front than Harrod's. Less spine than a jellyfish. Pretending he and his mates have acted as "the Coalition's Conscience". Congratulating himself on his party being a "moral weather vane" for the Government, pointing us all in the right direction. As I briefed off the record shortly afterwards, a WEATHER VANE SIMPLY INDICATES WHICH WAY THE WIND'S BLOWING. He's insufferable.
Ah, I hear you say. ALL politicians are insufferable now. You're right. Never before have we been so universally despised. We used to be in a stratum of contempt just above burglars and phone-hackers. Not any more. Instead of doing our job - a bloody important job, I might add - we're now supposed to spend our time on "damage limitation". Eating double portions of shit-cake. Apologising to everyone. Oh boo hoo, someone's hurt your feelings? Try fielding a constituency surgery (nearly) every week, you cry-babies. Christ knows I hate us more than anyone now. I for one would love to see this Coalition die on its lopsided arse; it's just making everyone look bad.
Still, at least Stewart Pearson's zeitgeisty, guff-wafting gibberish seems to be on the way out. I remember when Conference was like a spiritual homecoming for him. Zipping around on his little scooter like a Beach Boy on diet pills, shouting "Dotcom!" and "Love not Legislation!" and "Unthink the Rethinkable!" or whatever. This year he actually proposed - and here I shudder - a "policy version of the popular TV show The Voice". Don't ask me, it's probably hosted by Noel Edmonds.
Stewart genuinely wanted me and three other Ministers of the Crown to sit in huge red PVC thrones, facing AWAY FROM (?) a succession of gormless, partially-baked members of the Youth Wing (can't call it that now: too "Isherwood"). The hopeful kids would then "audition" by pitching "high cloud" (ill-considered, unworkable) policy ideas. Mercifully, JB pulled the plug before I could properly discern what it was all about. Word from Number 10 was "it looks like we're having too much fun". JB's either an idiot (possible) or he was slapping Pearson down (let's hope). Then we had a "thought jam" to come up with a better idea. I suggested we crammed Stewart into a circus cannon and fired him though the "high cloud" to see what cultural impact he might have on, say, Croydon. No-speaks for the rest of the afternoon.
I'd better go. I have a speech to write and I don't even know what I'm allowed to put in it. Can you say "current climate" in the current climate? Ah well, what difference does it make it the end, eh? Pulvis et umbra sumus, mate. We are dust and shadow...
Yours,
Peter
Keith Sansum1
- Location: london
- Registered: 25 Aug 2010
- Posts: 23,948
#2
but the guy who called the police all those names wont be there
and the police are demonstrating outside as well
ALL POSTS ARE MY OWN PERSONAL VIEWS
Guest 649- Registered: 12 Mar 2008
- Posts: 14,118
#3
The wording on post 1 should be taken out,no need for it on a family forum.
Guest 716- Registered: 9 Jun 2011
- Posts: 4,010
#4
MP`s warn the optimism that won the PM his party leadership has evaporated and more gloom
gathers as new polls show voters prefer Milliband and Boris.
2020 Tory group says the country needs leadership.....
Polls show Milly at 45 % ...Flashman at 31 % and Cleggy at 8 %......
Cameron slaps down ``Hunt`` for 12 week gaffe when he was hoping to use Conference to `detoxify`
his nasty party image.
Jesse Norman godfather of the Cameroon`s out of favour for his rebellion over Lords reform is leading
the Tory 2020 groups cry `Britain needs leadership`
Fresh scrutiny of Cameron `s links with JCB Sir Antony ( donor to the Tory party ) after opening his
Brazil Factory regarding his nomination to the Lords being withdrawn following the Lords vetting
committee`s concerns over his tax affairs........
Cameron`s baggage is tipping the scales......
Keith Sansum1- Location: london
- Registered: 25 Aug 2010
- Posts: 23,948
#5
Whilst i have no interest in the party conferences and even less in the tory one, the slap down of hunt was one that shows cameron is desperate to cling on to his leadership/prime minister
ALL POSTS ARE MY OWN PERSONAL VIEWS
Guest 693- Registered: 12 Nov 2009
- Posts: 1,266
#6
Like Keith, I have no interest in Party Political conferences, especially the leaders' speeches, which seem to me to be just an exercise in propaganda. I vote on issues, not personalities: over recent years that has meant voting for the party which does most to get us out of Europe (thus, UKIP).
This year, more than ever, I find the Tories' conference a non-event. I'd rather a Conservative Government than a coalition, but I do find their attitude ghastly. The Chief Whip's behaviour towards the Coppers in Downing Street seems endemic of an image of "we're better than you" that I cannot abide. However, would I let Labour anywhere near the economy again? Would I f...........!
True friends stab you in the front.
Guest 653- Registered: 13 Mar 2008
- Posts: 10,540
#7
Love your last sentence Andy.
Roger
Guest 710- Registered: 28 Feb 2011
- Posts: 6,950
#8
Is that the one that comes right after the second last sentence Roger?
Ignorance is bliss, bliss is happiness, I am happy...to draw your attention to the possible connectivity in the foregoing.
Guest 716- Registered: 9 Jun 2011
- Posts: 4,010
#9
Surely you jest.........Ossie`s two and a half years has taken us in to reverse..........he cannot grasp more and more
unemployment means less and less revenue..........economic growth is going backwards.........
Keith Sansum1- Location: london
- Registered: 25 Aug 2010
- Posts: 23,948
#10
yep reg;
and record youth unemployment
and some happy to see over 4 million on dole
quite frightening
ALL POSTS ARE MY OWN PERSONAL VIEWS
Guest 716- Registered: 9 Jun 2011
- Posts: 4,010
#11
Cameron tells Andrew Marr that he will make the wealthy pay their ``fair`` share of Tax...........nah !...his lips were moving....
Guest 698- Registered: 28 May 2010
- Posts: 8,664
#12
#5, Keith, I can't understand why you would waste your time posting three times on a topic in which you profess not to have any interest.
I'm an optimist. But I'm an optimist who takes my raincoat - Harold Wilson
Guest 696- Registered: 31 Mar 2010
- Posts: 8,115
#13
UKIP campaigns for leaving the EU, but also states:
"Fully support the monarchy, oppose disestablishment of the Church of England, and consider transferring part of the Crown Estate back to the Royal family in return for ending their State support"
However, the monarchy signed the Lisbon Treaty.
I'm in favour of a Constitution whereby no private family can be the head of the State, head of the Government and head of the Church. As a Christian I believe that only Jesus can be the Head of the Church.
As for the Lisbon Treaty, if it had been signed by a politician, I'm sure UKIP would be blazing hammer and tongs at that person, and not offering them the Crown Estate.
Guest 653- Registered: 13 Mar 2008
- Posts: 10,540
#14
Keith and Reg. - you both have incredibly short memories, or you are just in denial.
Tom, I was referring to Andy's comment: "However, would I let Labour anywhere near the economy again? Would I f...........!"
Roger
Guest 655- Registered: 13 Mar 2008
- Posts: 10,247
#15
#11 - seeing that the better off 10% of the population already contribute 57% of the income tax take that must mean that they (we) will have to pay less.
The truth is that it is a mere sound bite because increasing tax rates on that section of the community will reduce the tax collected.
You always ignore the facts to pursue your anti-success and aspiration agenda.
howard mcsweeney1- Location: Dover
- Registered: 12 Mar 2008
- Posts: 62,352
#16
alex
the queen has no choice but to sign anything that the government tells her to.
Guest 698- Registered: 28 May 2010
- Posts: 8,664
#17
Actually she has a choice but the last time that prerogative was exercised was in 1707 by Queen Anne. To do so now would spark a constitutional crisis.
I'm an optimist. But I'm an optimist who takes my raincoat - Harold Wilson
Brian Dixon
- Location: Dover
- Registered: 23 Sep 2008
- Posts: 23,940
#18
that would be the chop then,i can just see the axe man sharping his axe right now.
Guest 716- Registered: 9 Jun 2011
- Posts: 4,010
#19
Where has Ossie been for two and a half years ?...............he is still saying `We are all in this together`...........
Guest 649- Registered: 12 Mar 2008
- Posts: 14,118
#20
She should do the same over the port,and that is what I put in my letter to her.