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This cracked me up a politician with a great sense of humour.
Ruth Davidson, the Scottish Conservative leader, gave a speech to a press gallery lunch today and her jokes went down a storm. My colleague Anushka Asthana has collected some of the highlights.
Davidson mocked Andrea Leadsom.
Before politics not only was a BBC journalist but I singlehandedly saved the British banking system during the Barings collapse ... A little known fact was that I was the original Misha the bear at the 1980 Moscow olympics, and that was the same year I won Eurovision. Which speaking as a mother ...
She explained why she did not take part in the EU referendum debate alongside Angela Eagle.
I’d had a phone call from Craig Oliver saying we want you to do the Wembley debate, Labour are putting up Angela Eagle. That is great Craig but are you absolutely sure you want two short-haired, flat shoes, shovel-faced lesbians with a northern accent?
I think he’d never been spoken to like that before as he turned into Hugh Grant and (grunts) ... Then we got Sadiq.
She mocked Labour.
Everyone else in UK politics is either resigning, getting knifed, bottling it, withdrawing, failing, declaring, or falling on their sword.
I think the mad thing in all of the last few weeks is that the last man standing is Jeremy Corbyn. Although I am pleased that the PLP is about to show how united they are by putting forward a second unity candidate against the first.
That’s the difference between our two parties - Labour is still fumbling with its flies while the Tories are enjoying their post-coital cigarette. After withdrawing our massive Johnson.
And then she mocked Leadsom again.
I didn’t say that, you can’t report that, and it would be gutter journalism of the highest order if you wrote down exactly what I’ve just said.