Oh dear Heart, you really need to pluck up the courage to leave your bedroom once in a while and engage with real people, using your real name, rather than quoting nonsense from the Daily Mail.
You see, I did speak at the school and had a thoroughly enjoyable time. What's more, the cartoonist Martha Richler sent me the original cartoon as a gift.
You see Heart, we're not all inadequate little twerps that are scared to share their identity.
