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    So excluding housing, childcare and council tax the cost is £75,436?

    Unless there's something wrong with my spreadsheet that means the lower orders are expecting the cost of the spawn of their loins to be over £80 a week!

    What the Hell are they doing? Weaning them on Moet and giving them Beluga caviare as their first solid meal?

    No wonder my four suffered such a deprived childhood.

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