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    Simple instructions for a vomit free crossing.

    1. When on board go to toilet immediately. This will avoid the need to go to the toilet later where you will see people throwing up whereupon you will join them.

    2. Stand at bar and drink 'shorts'. (If you go on long drinks you will have to go to the toilet - see 1 above)

    3. (the tricky bit). Focus on the bottles above the optics. Your task is to keep yourself perpendicular to the top of the liquids in the bottle. If you succeed in this, whilst the rest of the vessel rocks and rolls, you will be transported gracefully to France in a state of total equilibrium as though mounted on gimbals.

    4. Do not consider for a minute driving afterwards. You are now pissed.


    Always works for me!

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