• The post you are reporting:
   
  Okay I need to build this up...play the Psycho music
  
  ...szink szink szink..those screaming violins!
  
  Because.....I handled the latest technology this morning at Tesco and no mistake. Here's the story. I rushed into the superstore, grabbed a few Pot Noodles in a basket expecting it to be a quick visit, but then when I got round to the tills....freakin' Nora.....the world and his wife were there with shopping trolleys piled higher than the Arc de Triomphe. Gawd dammit sez I under me breath.
  
  Nothing for it then but to approach those new auto tills. With shivering cold sweats and aching limbs, no it wasnt swine flu, I approached those terrifyng objects of the modern age. I gazed in abject bewilderment at a screen spouting instructions and then with stress palpitations mounting higher than my cholesterol levels...I shoved the first of the Pot Noodles through the refined process...that's one for the archbishop thought I... as technology had taken away my entire human contact. I got the assorted items through the window, it bleeped happily with each item and contrary to what I had expected, I failed to make a balls of it!!
  
  It sucked the twenty pound note out of my hands, spit out the coins and a nice female voice from within told me to
  "Please collect your change!"
  then
  "Please take your items home!"
  
  I left the store feeling I had made some kind of victory, not least that I had managed to bypass the queus of proles standing there like wide-eyed sheep in an auction pen, waiting miserably for their turn to be lanced!
  I happily rode off on my motorcycle whistling dixie!

Report Post

Your Name

Reason